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Whatever your sexual orientation there is no difference when it comes to parenthood. Time, commitment, and love are what every child needs no matter if their parents are same-sex couples or not.

We’re going to look at the different options to prepare for parenthood as a gay couple.

Before The Baby Arrives

Gay couples now have a variety of choices available to start a family. Researching the different options will allow you and your partner to determine which option is right for you, but surrogacy and adopting or fostering are most popular for gay couples.


Agencies like Joy of Life® offer surrogacy as a route into parenthood, which means that one of you can be the biological father. This means that your baby has a genetic connection to the family.

You will need to find a woman who can provide the eggs and carry them, or create embryos using donated eggs from a fertility clinic, and then find a surrogate mother. Surrogacy agencies can help with this match. If you are transgender you can provide the eggs yourself.

Adopting or Fostering

Gay couples can apply to foster or adopt a child to start a family. An assessment will be completed before you can become adoptive parents, which will be guided by a social worker.

How Much Will It Cost?

Opting for surrogacy will require a budget. Surrogacy costs between $100,000-$140,000 including the cost of a surrogate mother, agency fees, attorney fees, and general transport and accommodation finances. If adoption is your chosen route then applications will also require a fee.

This of course is before you consider the overall cost and expense of raising a child, like any other couple having children.

People Might Not Understand Your Decision

Unfortunately, in some cases, people will not accept or understand your decision to be gay parents. Although there should be no discrimination, sadly we have to be realistic and aware that this is part of the preparation for same-sex parenthood.

After The Baby Arrives

Normalize Different Sexual Orientations

As you raise your child, begin normalizing sexual orientation within your family structure. This is so they know that while their family might seem different from their peers, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with gay parents.

One way to do this is by showing them books, films, and TV shows with your family structure so they can see themselves like other children.

Be Open About The Challenges

Be open with your child and discuss the challenge of same-sex parenting. Unfortunately, there is still prejudice when it comes to gay couples, so part of parenthood will be preparing your child with positive responses in case of discrimination.

Talk To Us

Speak to Joy of Life® Surrogacy today to chat through your options as gay parents, and how we can help you prepare for parenthood.

Joy of Life

Author Joy of Life

Joy of Life is a compassionate surrogacy agency committed to creating life, fostering joy and nurturing dreams. We are experts in our field, with team members boasting extensive experience in the clinical, psychological and legal aspects of surrogacy. But more than that, we are a family — a community bound by the shared purpose of helping others realize the joy of parenthood.

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