Surrogacy is a big decision that involves not just your body, but your time, emotions and relationships. Whether you’re drawn to the idea of helping someone grow their family or you’re curious about how surrogacy could support your personal financial goals, it’s worth looking at both the rewards and the realities surrogacy can yield.
This guide outlines both the benefits and challenges of becoming a surrogate mother to give you the clarity and confidence necessary to decide if this path is right for you.
If you already know you’re ready to become a surrogate, you can apply today and take the first step. Otherwise, keep reading to get a balanced look at what this journey really involves, from compensation and care to logistics and emotional impact.
Pros of Being a Surrogate Mother
If helping someone grow their family feels like something that could be deeply meaningful to you, surrogacy may be a path worth exploring. While every journey is different, many women who choose to become a surrogate mother describe the experience as financially, emotionally and personally rewarding.
Here are some of the most meaningful benefits our surrogates often share when reflecting on their experience:
1. Receive Generous Compensation
Surrogates receive generous financial compensation for their time, commitment and the risks involved in pregnancy and childbirth. This payment reassures surrogates that their efforts are valued. For many women, surrogacy enables them to achieve significant financial goals that enrich their lives. Depending on experience, location and other factors, surrogate mothers with Joy of Life® typically receive anywhere from $60,000 to $85,000 in total compensation.
2. Experience a Deeply Fulfilling and Purpose-Driven Journey
Becoming a surrogate mother is a selfless act that brings immense satisfaction and pride by helping another family have a child. Carrying and delivering a baby for intended parents who can’t conceive is a significant, life-changing opportunity. Surrogacy provides profound emotional rewards through the ability to impact numerous lives.
3. Contribute to Inclusive Family Building
Surrogacy provides parenting opportunities to LGBTQ couples, single parents and those with health conditions who otherwise could not carry a child. These arrangements reflect love, compassion and an inclusive commitment to helping all people form their desired families. Surrogacy enables diverse family structures and reflects the many ways people build families today.
4. You’re Legally Protected by Clear Contracts
As a surrogate, you are protected by ironclad legal contracts and court orders safeguarding your rights. Surrogacy attorneys work to ensure agreements address your compensation, healthcare, schedule and other needs while upholding your autonomy. With binding documentation and representation solely focused on your best interests, you can be confident your rights as a surrogate are secured.
5. Build Lasting Relationships With Intended Parents
Many surrogates stay in touch with the intended parents and receive updates about the child as they grow up. From the matching process, surrogates and intended parents often form a natural friendship based on mutual respect and working together during the surrogacy journey. Some even maintain lifelong relationships after the baby is born.
6. You’ll Receive Comprehensive Medical Care
The intended parents agree to pay for all medical costs arising during the pregnancy and birth, including medications, appointments, hospital stays and procedures. Surrogates pay nothing out of pocket and can undergo necessary treatments without financial worry. This comprehensive coverage provides peace of mind.
7. Thorough Health and Psychological Screenings
Surrogates undergo robust medical and psychological assessments, including bloodwork, genetic testing, family history analysis and mental health evaluations. This rigorous screening ensures that only fully healthy, mentally prepared women can become surrogates. This protects the surrogate from undue risks and provides confidence for intended parents that the surrogate is fit for pregnancy.
8. You’ll Give The Gift of a Biological Connection
As a surrogate, you can provide intended parents with the ability to have a child genetically related to them. Even if donor eggs or sperm are used, surrogacy enables the intended mother or father to pass on their genes and maintain biological ties to their baby. Many surrogates find deep fulfillment in helping intended parents have the genetic connection to their child they’ve dreamed of.
9. You’ll Have The Opportunity to Change Lives Forever
Surrogacy is a generous act of service. If you meet the requirements and feel called to help others in this way, it’s a powerful chance to give the gift of parenthood and be part of something bigger than yourself.
Cons of Being a Surrogate Mother
Surrogacy can be incredibly meaningful, but like any pregnancy, it comes with real challenges. Understanding these challenges ahead of time can help you make a confident, well-informed decision.
Here are some of the more difficult aspects of the experience to take into account:
1. Surrogacy Can Be Physically Demanding
As a surrogate mother, not only will you be dealing with the expected side effects of being pregnant, but you’ll be required to go in for screenings, appointments, treatments and more. Surrogacy comes with inherent medical risks such as gestational diabetes, preeclampsia, miscarriage, premature birth, etc., just like any other pregnancy does. Surrogates undertake these risks that their pregnancy would typically involve.
2. Surrogacy Is a Lengthy Process
Becoming a surrogate requires an extensive commitment of over 12 months. The process involves numerous evaluations, appointments, treatments and legal procedures that can disrupt everyday work and family life. Surrogates must adjust schedules, arrange childcare and dedicate significant time to surrogacy responsibilities throughout the lengthy process. While demanding, the journey presents a unique and meaningful opportunity for qualified surrogates.
3. Surrogacy Can Be Emotionally Challenging
While incredibly rewarding, surrogacy arrangements can stir up complex emotions. After birth, parting ways with the newborn you’ve nurtured for nine months may be difficult. Surrogacy is only recommended for those who are confident they can manage these potential emotional challenges. Reputable agencies provide free counseling to help surrogates process feelings and cope with any difficulties on the journey. Most women find the experience emotionally manageable and profoundly positive overall with proper support.
4. May Involve Invasive Medical and Psychological Evaluations
Surrogates must undergo many intrusive tests during the screening process, including blood draws, genetic testing, STD tests, psychological evaluations and an analysis of their complete mental health history. The probing nature of the screening can be mentally and physically taxing.
5. Laws on Surrogacy Vary and Can Complicate Things
Surrogacy laws differ significantly by location, creating complex legal issues around contracts, payments, parental rights and citizenship. While this uncertain legal landscape can seem challenging, working with an experienced surrogacy lawyer and agency is critical to navigating it confidently. Reputable professionals can provide invaluable guidance on jurisdiction-specific laws and ensure legal rights are protected through surrogacy contracts.
6. Ethical Concerns Can Lead to Stigma
Surrogates often encounter criticism and ethical objections from society based on the misconception that surrogacy exploits women and commodifies babies. Surrogates must be prepared to face stigma and lack of support from those with moral reservations. Hurtful judgment and discrimination can cause emotional damage without proper resilience.
7. Lack of Regulation Can Be Risky
Women can face risks of financial exploitation or being pressured into unfair arrangements. This can happen if you enter a surrogacy agreement without proper oversight, especially in places without regulations. To protect yourself, it’s essential to do your research on agencies and clinics, ask questions, review contracts carefully, seek independent legal advice and trust your instincts if anything seems wrong. It can be challenging, but finding a reputable and ethical agency that prioritizes your health and rights will make the process safe and positive.
Ready to Take the First Step in Your Surrogacy Journey?
If reading through the benefits and challenges helped you feel more informed, you might be ready to take the next step. You can explore compensation details or start your application whenever the time feels right. We’re here to support you with honesty, care and guidance, wherever you are in the process.
Frequently Asked Questions About Surrogacy
If you’re still curious or weighing your options, you’re not alone. These are some of the most common questions we hear from women considering surrogacy, and they might help you feel even more confident about what comes next.
1. How Ccommon is surrogacy in the U.S.?
According to the CDC, 12% of females experience difficulties conceiving or sustaining a pregnancy, and 19% of all couples are unable to conceive after a year of unprotected sex. There are many factors that contribute to this, but with the advancement of reproductive technologies, surrogacy has increased in popularity in the United States in recent years. In the CDC’s 2021 Fertility Clinic Success Rates Report, it was discovered that approximately 2.3% of all infants born in the United States each year are conceived using assisted reproductive technology (ART).
2. What is the success rate of surrogacy?
The success rate of surrogacy is between 75% and 95%. While success rates can vary for different reasons, the CDC calculated that IVF clinics in the U.S. have a pregnancy success rate of about 75%, and once the surrogate is pregnant, a 95% success rate for a healthy birth.
3. How can a surrogacy agency help me?
A surrogacy agency can provide you with professional advice and legal counsel to fully understand the surrogacy process, protections, and obligations involved. Ask questions to determine whether surrogacy aligns with your beliefs, values and life circumstances at this time. You may even consider speaking with a counselor about managing potential emotional aspects. With the proper guidance and self-knowledge, surrogates who feel wholly ready to commit can experience immense fulfillment in changing lives through surrogacy. The choice relies on listening to your needs and intuition first and foremost.
Want to Learn More or Apply? We’re Here When You’re Ready
Whether you’re just starting to explore surrogacy or already feel confident that this path is right for you, you deserve guidance that meets you where you are.
At Joy of Life®, many of us have been surrogates ourselves, which means we understand the questions, the emotions and the care this journey deserves. Our team is here to walk you through every step, answer whatever’s on your mind and make sure you feel supported from your first click all the way through to postpartum recovery.
If you’re ready, you can start your application today. Not quite there yet? Reach out and let’s talk through it together.
