Becoming a surrogate is a life-changing journey that brings the joy of parenthood to others. At Joy of Life®, we understand how deeply personal and meaningful this path can be.
Whether you’re just beginning your research or are ready to apply, this guide walks you through how to become a surrogate and what to expect at every stage.
Who Can Become a Surrogate?
To protect the health and safety of both surrogate and baby, all applicants go through an initial screening to confirm eligibility. Minimum requirements typically include:
- Be between the ages of 21 and 38
- Be a U.S. citizen or permanent resident
- Non-smoker in a non-smoking household
- Have a BMI between 18 and 30
- Have had at least one full-term pregnancy without complications
- Provide OB/GYN records for all pregnancies
- Be raising your own biological child
- Live a healthy, drug-free lifestyle
Understanding the Types of Surrogacy
There are two main types of surrogacy, and understanding the difference can help you feel more confident in your decision.
Gestational Surrogacy (Most Common)
- You do not share a genetic link to the baby
- Embryo is created through IVF using intended parents’ or donor sperm/egg
- Legally and emotionally clearer for most families
Traditional Surrogacy (Rare)
- Your egg is used, so you are biologically related to the child
- Typically done via IUI (intrauterine insemination)
- Less common due to emotional and legal complexities
At Joy of Life®, we only work with gestational surrogates.
You may also hear terms like commercial surrogacy (you receive compensation) or altruistic surrogacy (you are reimbursed only for expenses).
How to Become a Surrogate: Step-by-Step
Here’s a look at what the journey typically involves:
1. Connect with a Reputable Surrogacy Agency
A trusted agency like Joy of Life® will walk you through every step with compassion and professionalism, from application to delivery.
2. Match with Intended Parents
You’ll review profiles and choose intended parents based on mutual values and comfort. Joy of Life® ensures alignment in personality, preferences and goals.
3. Go Through Screenings
This includes medical exams, psychological evaluations and a thorough review of your history to ensure you’re fully prepared for the journey.
4. Legal Contracts and Medical Prep
Contracts are drawn up to outline responsibilities and expectations. You’ll then begin IVF treatment in preparation for the embryo transfer.
5. Pregnancy and Birth
Once pregnant, you’ll receive full support through prenatal care, birth and postpartum recovery. Joy of Life® offers 24/7 access to care and guidance.
Have Questions About Becoming a Surrogate?
Whether you’re curious about eligibility, compensation or what to expect day-to-day, our experienced surrogacy team is here to offer clear, compassionate answers.
Contact us today to get the information and support you need to take the next step.
Talking to Your Family About Surrogacy
Being open and prepared can make all the difference. Here are a few tips:
- Start with empathy – share your reasons and what the process looks like
- Answer concerns honestly – be ready for questions
- Discuss logistics – how it will impact schedules, health and emotions
- Lean on agency support – Joy of Life® can help with resources and counseling
Surrogacy impacts everyone around you. Creating understanding ensures you have a strong support system.
Frequently Asked Questions About Becoming a Surrogate
We have a full list of FAQs about surrogacy, but here are some of the most common questions we hear from people who want to become surrogates:
1. Is Being a Surrogate for a Friend Permitted?
Yes, it is possible to be a surrogate for a friend or to undertake the surrogate mother process for a friend. However, here at Joy of Life, we still follow the strict protocol surrounding surrogates and their intended parents, regardless of their relationship.
With this said, we also offer surrogate mothers the opportunity to be gestational carriers, which means that they will not have any genetic link to the child that’s born. When this is done, the intended parents’ own eggs and/or sperm are used, and then an embryo will be implanted into the surrogate’s womb during the surrogate mother process.
It is also possible to be a traditional surrogate whereby you, as the surrogate, will have a genetic link to the child. If you are friends with the intended parents, they might not mind the genetic link. This is something to be discussed, of course, by both parties.
This can happen in the surrogacy process if the surrogate is a close relation to one of the intended parents, such as a sister.
2. Can I Become a Surrogate Without a Previous Pregnancy?
The simple answer is no. Among the surrogate mother process requirements, one has to have had at least one previous successful pregnancy before one can be considered to be a surrogate.
This is a guideline that’s laid down by the American Society for Reproductive Medicine and one that we follows to increase the chances of a successful outcome.
3. Can You Be a Surrogate if Your Tubes Are Tied?
Yes, it is perfectly possible if the type of surrogacy opted for is gestational, whereby the surrogate does not have to use her own eggs. Tubal ligation does not prevent a woman from being a gestational surrogate, either.
Getting your tubes tied doesn’t inhibit the embryo from being transplanted into the surrogate’s womb. The only thing that getting your tubes tied does is to prevent ovulation in the surrogate, which, by no means, has any bearing on this surrogacy process.
4. If I Have HPV, Does This Disqualify Me From Becoming a Surrogate?
No, having HPV does not disqualify you from being a surrogate; however, the conditions of birth might be influenced by this diagnosis. The surrogate’s medical records with colposcopy results are required in order to chart out a proper birth plan and match with parents who don’t mind.
HPV will not harm the child, and neither will it hamper the baby’s development. If the surrogate develops genital warts prior to birth, a C-section will be necessary.
5. Is It Possible to Not Fall Pregnant?
Yes, but if the surrogate has made it through our intense screening process, the chances of not falling pregnant after the embryo transfer attempts are slim.
6. When the Child Is Born, What Is Expected?
What happens after the baby is born is determined by what you have agreed with the intended parents. Some surrogates have no qualms about having the intended parents in the room with them to share in the birth of their child.
Once the child is born, the intended parents may assume their parental rights. Depending on the discussed points, the intended parents may take the child home and allow for visits, or they might move away with the child and keep in touch through email or other media as agreed upon.
Some intended parents may not wish to have any ongoing relationship with the surrogate mother. What happens at this stage will be based on your prior agreement with them, which is in writing.
It’s not uncommon for some surrogates to go through an emotional upheaval at this time, and some may require post-partum counseling from the surrogacy agency.
7. Is There a Timeline for Matching?
There are no hard and fast rules about how soon you will be matched. There is a lot that happens behind the scenes to ensure that both potential surrogates and intended parents are matched up with the right party based on their unique set of preferences.
8. What Is Assisted Reproductive Technology?
For couples struggling to have children, or women considering surrogacy, assisted reproductive technology (ART) offers a solution. This is a medical procedure whose objective is getting a woman pregnant by scientific means and not through sexual intercourse.
There are various ART solutions, which include in vitro fertilization (IVF), intracervical insemination, intrauterine insemination, donation of gametes, intracytoplasmic sperm insemination and embryo transfer.
More Tips to Support Your Surrogacy Journey
Surrogacy agencies require all surrogates, regardless of marital status, to have a solid, strong support system in order to proceed with surrogacy. Surrogacy is a taxing, emotionally exhaustive, and trying process hence the need for a good community that will stand with you throughout your journey. The average surrogacy journey can last anywhere from one year to two years. Here are some tips to help you along the way.
Ensure You’re Ready for Extra Stress
There can be no doubt that pregnancy brings with it additional stress! From the hormone treatments a surrogate will receive to dealing with the questions that will undoubtedly come from society, it is vital to prepare for the extra stress that will come. There will also be physical stresses such as nausea, swelling, fatigue, cold feet, and backache.
Emotional stress can be triggered by thoughts of delivery and who will take care of the child if anything happens to you. Figuring out a strategy for managing the various stresses ahead of time will prove beneficial.
Pick the Right Supportive Intended Parents
Fortunately, if you’re working with a reputable surrogacy agency, you don’t have to go through the arduous process of screening the intended parents you would like to work with by yourself.
An agency will assist you in creating your surrogate profile and present you with the profiles of intended parents with similar surrogacy goals and plans. In this way, you can be assured of picking not only the right intended parents that you feel comfortable with, but indented parents who will provide you with the kind of support you would like to receive.
Work Through the Right Surrogacy Agency
Navigating surrogacy alone can be an uphill task. Many surrogates prefer to be guided by experienced professionals. That is why they choose to work through a surrogacy agency. A surrogacy agency will provide legal, mental health, and general support.
Having recourse to a trusted agency will lead to less stress for you as the surrogate. Listening to the stories and testimonials of former surrogates who have worked with your chosen agency will give you peace of mind and assurance that you are in good hands.
Maintain a Healthy Lifestyle:
Good health is advantageous to women considering surrogacy. Being in optimal health can make your pregnancy easier. Doctors encourage women thinking of surrogacy to adopt a healthier way of life to increase the odds of a smoother pregnancy term.
A healthy lifestyle isn’t just good for the surrogate only but will prove beneficial to the baby she is carrying. Routine exercise can decrease postpartum depression, reduce potential complications during labor, and help to balance the hormonal changes a surrogate will potentially face.
Ready to Take the First Step?
At Joy of Life®, we’re a community of former surrogates and intended parents who understand every step of this life-changing journey.
When you reach out, our team will guide you through the process, from your initial questions to medical screenings and beyond. You’ll get the resources, support and personalized guidance you need to feel confident and empowered.
Have questions? Contact us for a free, no-obligation consultation. Ready to begin? Apply to become a surrogate mother today.
